Thursday, April 14, 2011

Cherished

Day 18: If you had a friend who talked to you like you talk to yourself, how long would you allow that person to be your friend?

To be honest, I think I would dump that friend within a few days.

I don't talk to myself very nicely most of the time.  If I trip and stumble, I think to myself, "Come on, Emily.  You're such a klutz.  Can't you even walk right?"  If I miss a problem on an exam: "You're so stupid.  Why can't you remember the answers?"  If I don't succeed at something: "You're absolutely worthless.  Why did God even make you?"

My thoughts can be absolutely cruel at times.  What's sad is that this is me.  I'm insulting not only myself, but a child of God.  I don't deserve these insults.  I am valued.  I am cherished and loved by God.  I'm His treasure.

I don't tolerate meanness from friends.  If I feel like a friend is bringing me down, I'll let her know.  And if she is outright mean to me or will not stop saying hurtful comments, I'll end the friendship because I do know that I'm worth more than being mocked and put down.  I don't take cruelty.  At least not from others.

When I talk to myself like I sometimes do, I'm sinning.  I'm putting down a creation of God.  I'm saying that something He made with love isn't good enough.  I'm calling the apple of God's eye worthless.  That's a mistake.  That's a sin.

I need to work on treating myself better.  It may be easy to put myself down and use hateful names, but I'm worth more than that.  I know in my heart that I am.  This has all come from the time in my life when I was severely depressed and suicidal, back when I thought my life wasn't worth living.  I hated myself.  I gave my own life no value at all.  While I now know my life holds value, old habits die hard.  I still insult myself when I mess up.

From now on, whenever I put myself down, I'm going to consciously try to correct myself.  "No, you aren't stupid.  No, you aren't ugly.  No, you aren't worthless.  God made you to be glorious.  You're His beloved."

God made me beautiful.  He has given me value and it's time to treat myself that way.

Here are today's questions:
1.) If you had a friend who talked to you like you talk to yourself, how long would you allow that person to be your friend?
2.) Do you treat yourself with love or with hate?

3 comments:

  1. I have been reading your blog for about two days now. I know its not exactly my place to tell you but i think you should look into the jehovahs witness religion. It is diffferent than most, and everytime you blog your love for god is SO evident! I know about the jehovahs witness religion, and i think you would REALLY like it. Their knowledge about god and jesus is truly unmatchable. Again this isnt my place, but i think you should. Ther website is: www.jw.org

    I found it for you :) but ANYWAYS......lol i like Genesis 1:1!!! Its funny that right there the first page of the BIBLE it clearly states the earth was created. And it goes on how he created everything and how can everyone ignore that? There in the bible it tells you evelotion is crazy....
    -Mkenzey

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  2. That's an interesting question!
    1- I think I'd allow them to be my friend for as long as they wished- I'm not very good at deciding I don't want people in my life, and I find it hard to believe I deserve good treatment! So, I don't think it'd be much of a case of me deciding they weren't going to be my friend- I can't make that choice- I'm too loyal to people, which isn't always a good thing!

    2- Generally, hate, which I guess makes my answer to number one a little.. strange! I find it hard to see any reason to love me, indeed, any value I hold at all, and while I know that as a child of God I supposedly hold value, something which my youth leader tries to reinforce, it's something which I do struggle to see, and believe.

    I have another question, if you don't mind [heh, if you do, ignore me!]
    Do you treat your friends in the same way as you treat yourself? How do they react, or how would they react if you did?

    :)

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  3. Interesting question. Well, considering I often don't treat myself very well, I absolutely don't treat my friends that way! If I treated my friends that way, they'd probably be furious and call me out on it right away. I sure hope that I treat my friends well, so I think I often treat them better than I do myself.

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