Friday, December 23, 2011

I'm Young.

Day 30: How have you grown in your faith this month?

I feel like the Lord has shown me so much this month.  Several perspective-altering things have happened since the beginning of December, like my first finals week of college (and all the stress involving that), leaving new friends, coming back home to live with my parents again (for a month), and reuniting with high school friends.  It's strange, and I'm not sure if I can accurately express this all in words, but being home is so much the same that it's almost odd.  And then, little things are different that also make things feel odd.

Like my brother.  He has to have grown a foot in the last four months.  He's as tall as me now.

My friends are all a little different too.  Not necessarily in bad ways.  They've all grown and matured in these last few months, just like I have, but it's just a difference, you know?  Things have changed.  They have new friends, new habits, newly formed beliefs.

And for the first time in a while, I'm living back in my parents' home.  I'm being told to drink my milk, eat my veggies, clean my room.  And that's different to me.  It's not horrifying or anything like that.  It's just different.

I've always been terrified of change.  But in the last year and even in the last month, God has really formed my heart and shown me that change can be a good thing.  It'll be hard sometimes, but it isn't bad.  I have to change in order to grow in Him.  And He is a solid rock in my life throughout it all.
The Lord has shown me what it means to truly rely on Him.  During difficult tests and moments of confusion, He is there.  He is holding my hand.  He loves me unconditionally.

It's difficult to know what to say to answer a question like this because I feel like I have so much left to learn.  I'm so small and so young.  But I do feel like the Lord is constantly showing me things and that I'm growing.  Slowly, I'm growing.

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