Day 3: 8 Things You Couldn't Live Without

1.) The Laptop.  My laptop has everything on it: the things I write, the pictures I take, access to the world... and if I was only allowed to have eight objects, then it would give me access to a lot of other important things, like the Bible and even other books I need, both for school and for fun reading.  Without my laptop, I would survive, I know, but my life would be much sadder than it is today.

2.) Phone.  Since I live ten hours away from my family, a phone is pretty essential to my life.  Unfortunately, I don't have phone access in my dorm room, which has been extremely difficult, but I still use my phone constantly.  My phone has a GPS, local restaurants, a flashlight, an alarm clock, and multiple apps to make my life easier.  I do talk on the phone to my parents every single day.  It just happens to be when I'm out and about, usually on my way home from class.

(The picture to your right is actually pretty old, now that I think about it--around four years old--and I'm not holding my iPhone in it, but it seemed to fit.)

3.) A comfortable pillow.  I'm an insomniac.  It takes me a long time to fall asleep and sometimes it's difficult to stay asleep.  I have strict rituals I follow in order to be able to sleep through the night.  I need a quiet and pitch-black room.  Even the light of my clock is turned off.  I need the room temperature to be cool, but not cold.  I like to be bundled up in at least three blankets.  Most importantly, I like my pillow to be comfortable.  It needs to be the perfect mixture of fluffy and not-too-fluffy.  Without my pillow, especially on this uncomfortable dorm room bed, I don't know if I could ever fall asleep.

4.) My camera.  I take pictures of everything.  Most days, I carry around a digital camera and a video camera in my purse.  Even though my digital camera actually takes great videos, I take so many videos that having a video camera with a huge SD card can help keep room in my camera for all the pictures I take.  Plus, having an HD video camera helps a lot.  I love capturing memories, editing videos and pictures, and sharing them with everything else.  Sometimes I wish I could be a family photographer and capture memories for other people all day long. 

5.) Carmex.  When in was in middle school, I wore lip gloss all the time.  Now it's Carmex.  I take it everywhere.  Before I went to college, Mom and I went shopping for all of the toiletries I needed... and I came out of the store with a big bag filled with tubes of Carmex.  You may be a Chapstick person and if you are, I still love you, but Carmex is the way to go.  It's shiny, it's healthy, and I love it.

6.) My guitar.  Even though I don't write songs as much as I'd like, I love my guitar so much.  In my opinion, it's the most beautiful object in my entire bedroom.  If my room was burning down and I had the chance to grab two things, I think I'd grab my laptop and my guitar. 

7.) Calendars.  People are always surprised when they walk into my room and see the number of calendars I have.  I usually have two wall calendars, a desk calendar, a day-by-day calendar, and several calendar pages spread over my desk that I use to plan out my blog schedule.  I use the calendar on my iPhone frequently as well, along with the planner in my backpack right now.  I'm a calendar addict.  They make me feel secure and scheduled.  I couldn't live easily without a calendar (or five) nearby.

8.) Blankets.  I'm usually cold.  Most of the time, I'm wrapped in some sort of a blanket.  Right now in my small dorm room, I have five blankets that I use frequently.  Without my blankets, I'm not sure how I could survive.  I would be cold and miserable most of the time, at least.  I love watching movies while wrapped up in a blanket.  Don't you?

What are some things you can't live without?

Today is my mom's birthday.  I probably am not allowed to tell you how old she is, so I won't.  I love my mom so much.  She's been just like a mother to me. ;)

Mom,

You have been such a rock in my life.  You are my nurturer and my friend and I can't imagine life without you.  You inspire me so much.  I've missed you like crazy and I'm so glad to spend this weekend with you.  I've missed our lunches and shopping with you and watching "Lost" or "Monk" with you.  I've missed you.  Maybe one day I can move a few blocks away from you, just like you did with your mom.  After college, I don't think I ever want to live so far away from you again. 

I'm working on the CD, but it isn't finished yet.  But don't worry... I'll try to have it done by Christmas. 

Thanks for your encouragement and your spiritual guidance and your hugs and your texts and for sticking up for me no matter what.  I don't know anyone who has a better mom than I do.  I brag about you all the time.  You are a huge blessing to me and I thank God for giving me a mother like you.

Thanks for everything you've done for me.  I love you always.

-Emily

Day 2: 9 Things I Remember from my Childhood

1.)  My stories.  I've always loved to write since before I could even write.  I've always made up interesting stories, usually full of crimes and murders and intensity.  One of my best friends from my childhood was Rebekah, who I've mentioned on here before.  We were actually next door neighbors for several years.  During this time, I wrote a very "impressive" book series called "The Best Friend Mysteries."  In these books, we were kidnapped multiple times, fought off many bad guys, traveled all over the world, sold into slavery, befriended animals, and remained best friends forever every step of the way.  I bet you're jealous of that genious idea, right?

2.) I used to have rats as pets.  In fact, I didn't only keep them... I bred them.  I had quite a few interesting breeds of rats, including a couple of hairless. 

3.) More than anything in the world, I wished I could fly. 

4.) I was really, really, really bad at sports.  I've never been much of one for competition.  Dad often tells stories of when I was a member of an Upward basketball team as a third grader.  I would watch and make sure that everyone got to shoot the ball at least once, even the girls on the other team.  I'd often pass the ball to girls on the other team to make sure they got a chance.  My dad would be standing on the sidelines, yelling, "Emily, what are you doing?!?!"  I just wanted it to be fair.

5.) I always dreamed of making my own website.  I remember "designing" one when I was about eight years old on a piece of notebook paper.  I decided it would be a sponsorship organization of sorts and I would somehow find a lot of impoverished children and have people write letters to them.  On the page, I even drew a little picture of a child dressed in rags and gave her a name.  Unfortunately, the website never worked out.

I did make several relief organizations all growing up.  Their names usually consisted of an... interesting acronym, like:

Smiling

Eager (kids)

Ready (to)

Visit

Everyone!

Of course, Rebekah was always excited about the idea.  We'd plan for hours about how to save the world.

6.) Another interesting game I would play with Rebekah.  We actually held spy lessons in our front yards for the other neighborhood kids on Wednesday nights right after dark.  We would dress in all black and teach them how to drop to the ground or duck behind bushes when cars drove by, how to spy on the parents during their Bible studies, and how to identify bad guys to turn them into the police.  We even had the "younger" kids run relays and do push-ups and things like that.  We thought we were some legit spies.

I even carried a notebook around and made little notes about suspicious-looking people.  About a month ago, my grandma gave me one of those notes she found in her house.  She made me promise never to throw it away.  I haven't. 

In fact, once I got in trouble because my black pants were dirty so my mom caught me wearing my long black velvet dress skirt instead.  My response was, "But Mommmmm, I'm a spy and spies HAVE to wear all black!" 

7.) I wanted to own a ranch one day and fill it with a bunch of abused animals who I could talk to all the time.  I remember making lists of all the animals I wanted, like:

37 ponies named Crystal, Sarah, Jasmine, Starlight, Firefly, Blaze, Twilight....

16 dogs named Cupcake, Pal, Rico.........

23 cats named Percy, Lucy.....

10 kittens.....

13 foals....

8 puppies.....

and the list goes on and on and on.  At age six, I already wanted to be an intense animal hoarder. 

8.) I always thought it was gross to have a crush on a boy growing up.  My friends would whisper, "He's so cute.  I have a crush on him," and I would either say or think, "EWWWWW, he's a BOY!"  What's funny is that I was the first of my friends to actually make friends with a guy.  But I wasn't "interested" in guys for about two years after that.  Basically, my friends all "liked" guys but were afraid to talk to them.  I didn't "like" guys for quite a while, but I loved being friends with them.  So it all worked out.

9.)  In fifth grade, I was one of the tallest people in my class.  I just never grew after that.

Day 1: 10 Things Most People Wouldn't Know About You

1.) I recently discovered that my love language is quality time.  If you don't know what I'm talking about, you may want to check out this website and take the free quiz.  Love languages are big in my friend group and in my church.  Basically, your love language is how you best receive love.  Knowing the love language of your spouse is important, but it's also great to know the love languages of your friends, family, and even your co-workers.  For example, if your love language was physical touch and mine was words of affirmation, so I praised you all the time but never gave you a hug, you wouldn't feel connected to me.  When you learn someone's love language, you can better show them that you love them in a way they'll understand. 

I always thought mine was words of affirmation.  Ali and I were having a long conversation the other night and I blurted out, "I must be unlovable because words of affirmation don't really affect me that much."  Sure, I enjoy compliments, but I usually don't care what people think or say about me and criticism doesn't bother me a whole lot either.  So how could words of affirmation be my love language? 

"Well," Ali finally said, "what language do you use to show love to people?  Like your mom?"

It certainly wasn't words of affirmation.  Unless I know that someone's love language is words of affirmation, I tend to feel a little timid and even hold back my compliments.  I'm not a very vocal person.  We finally realized that I usually give love by spending time with someone.  I like my privacy and alone time, so when I reach out to spend time out of my day with someone, I'm showing love.  In the same way, it's very important to me for my friends and family to spend some quality time with me or else I'll start to feel a bit rejected.

Ali and I were quite proud that we figured out my actual love language after such a long discussion.  I suppose I'm not unlovable after all. ;)

2.) I once desperately believed that one day, Peter Pan (yes, I believed he was real), would come and take me to Neverland before I grew up.  I was certain that there was no way I would ever grow to be an adult.  I thought that imagination was the most important and wonderful thing in the world and that you certainly couldn't have an imagination if you were over the age of ten or eleven.  I had a little Peter Pan doll and I would carry him around and write stories about him, waiting and waiting for the real Peter Pan, the one from my favorite story, to come get me and fly me away.  Man, I couldn't wait until I could fly.  I know I was an odd child.

3.) I love to read, but I often don't bother to finish books.  If a book doesn't keep my attention, then I won't finish it.  I feel like I'm busy and don't have a lot of time to read these days.  If a book doesn't suck me into the story, then why should I waste my time?  I'm very picky.  If I don't like a book, I'll take it to Hastings and sell it. 

4.) My dream career would be to have something like Buck Williams' job from the "Left Behind" series.  Interesting, right?  Being an international journalist who got to travel all over the world and write for an amazing magazine would be my dream. 

My other dream job would be to blog professionally.  We'll see where these dreams go. :)

5.) I'm incredibly stubborn.  When I get into a debate, it's difficult for me to let my opinion go.  When I get angry, it can take a long time to let go of my grudge if I'm not careful.  I don't think most people realize this about me because I'm very laid back and noncontroversial.  I will nearly always let an issue go because I don't want to have to get into any sort of disagreement.  But once I do, I can be quite stubborn.  This can be both a very good and a very bad thing. 

6.) I apparently pretend to be tougher than I am.  Ali decided this about me recently and I don't deny it, although it did surprise me a little when she said so.  When I say this, I don't mean I act like a tough guy who threatens to beat people up and be "tough," but instead I suppose I try to be someone who isn't easily hurt or is rarely upset.  For example, if someone says, "I cry all the time in movies," I might automatically say, "Oh yeah, I never cry in movies."  I don't know why, but I hate being considered typical or emotional.  So I don't know if I'm as tough as I seem sometimes. 

Actually, I probably don't fool anyone.  When I act "tough," everyone is probably chuckling to themselves the entire time. 

7.) I actually do love being short.  And pale-skinned instead of tan.  I know that sounds strange, but I've grown to like who I am and what I look like.  When I sit here and think about when God made me to be this way, I imagine Him lovingly deciding that I would have very white skin and be shorter than the average person.  He made me to look the way I do and loved who He made.  I'm thankful for the way I look, even if it isn't always considered "beautiful" by my society's standards.  

8.) I hate change.  In fact, I will keep something until it breaks because I so desperately do not want to change it.  My mom got me a new alarm clock.  It has a fantastic stereo with an iPod dock included, but I still keep my familiar old iPod dock on my nightstand... because I love it.  And I've had it for years and years.  And it's perfectly fine.  I use both here and there, but I don't think I'll get rid of my old speakers until they finally break.  And when I do get rid of them, I'll be very sad.

Because I'm a creature of habit, I like things to remain where they are.  Always.  I felt bad for Ali when she shared my room.  She would simply move something from one end of the counter to the other and I would become a bit disoriented.  I like things to stay the same.  Can you imagine how it's been for me to have a brand new bedroom in a brand new city, starting a brand new church and a brand new school and making brand new friends?  Scary.

9.) Remember those clear plastic bracelets filled with glitter that spun when you moved?  You may have had one when you were a kid.  I still wear them.  Daily.  Usually just one at a time, but I find the bracelets incredibly entertaining.  When I'm bored in class or sitting in a traffic jam, I will spin the bracelet around and around in circles.

10.) I am always cold.  If you see me in a giant sweatshirt or jacket or blanket, it's not a fashion statement.  It's because I'm cold most of the time.  In fact, when I take my temperature, my body temp is usually a degree or two lower than 98.6.

What are some things about you that most people don't know?

Here are the last questions for the College Q&A.  If you ever have a specific question, you're always welcome to ask me in the comments or send me an email at jacksfavoriteowner@yahoo.com and I'll respond within a day or two.  You don't have to wait for a Q&A day to ask me something.  However, I wish there would have been a college Q&A when I was in high school, which is why I typed this up. 

Thanks for all of your questions. :) I hope this helps you out.  If you're in college now as well or have already graduated college, feel free to add your own input or experiences.

1.) Is college easier or harder than you expected? In what ways?

College is a lot harder than I expected.  I tried to walk into it ahead of time knowing that I would be homesick and lonely at first and that the schoolwork would be different... but nothing can really prepare you for something so unknown until you're actually in the moment.  So college is harder than I expected.

I've struggled emotionally more than I ever thought I would.  To be honest, I'm not a very emotional person.  I don't get homesick very easily.  For example, I went to Europe for nearly a month when I was twelve and I never really got homesick while I was over there.  I've been gone for only three weeks and I'm extremely homesick.  I miss my family and pets and friends and house and bedroom like crazy.  And I'm lonelier than I thought I would be as well.  I tried to tell myself that it's impossible to make close friends right away, but that hasn't made it any easier when I feel like there is no one around to talk to.

Schoolwork is also a bit harder than I expected.  While I knew it would be hard, I didn't realize it would be this overwhelming.  School tends to be my thing.  I'm not athletic, but I do like to learn.  I've always done well in school and I've never had to study until now, which has probably been to my harm.  This is the first time I've really had to study... ever.  And I'm having to read, read, read more than I ever thought I would.

2.) What is your favorite part of college?

My favorite part of college would have to be the independence.  It's nice to be able to make my own decisions about issues my parents controlled before  For example, I bought a fish when my mom wouldn't let me have one at home.  I am deciding my own reading material, my own church, and when and where I will go out.  For the first time, my parents are standing back completely and letting me control my own life.  While they have given me quite a bit of independence throughout my high school years, it's neat to be able to sit back and think, "I can decide what to do with my life today" and know that it's true.

About my particular college, my favorite part would be the people.  I have never seen so many nice people in one town before.  I rarely walk into a building without someone opening the door for me.  I have had my chair pulled out for me in the cafeteria.  I've seen guys give up their seats on the bus so a lady could sit down instead.  Guys have given up their place in the lunch line so I could go first.  There are so many gentlemen who attend Texas A&M. 

But it's not only the guys who are nice.  Girls are too.  Just the other day, I was having trouble loading my groceries into my car without the cart rolling away, so a girl around my age came up and held it for me.  People are so friendly in Aggieland.  You won't go anywhere without hearing, "Howdy" or "Can I help you with anything?"  I've come to realize that Aggies will do anything for each other.  That's such a wonderful bond to see.  It warms my heart every time I go out.

3.) What is your least favorite part of college?

My least favorite part of college would be the loneliness.  I hate this part more than anything.  I'm ten hours away from most of my family.  I'm several hours away from most of my friends.  It's so lonely here.  I don't know hardly anyone yet, especially not enough to feel truly relaxed and at home around them.  I miss spending time with Rebekah and Zeek.  I miss Jack.  I miss my family.  I miss sitting in my room.

It's so hard to go to bed at night without hugging my family goodnight.  I simply go back to my dorm room, watch an episode of "Lost" or read a couple of chapters of a book, and then go to bed, alone.  I often eat in the cafeteria alone.  This weekend, I'll probably be going to church alone.  The loneliness that comes with starting college in a new place seems unbearable sometimes.  I'm hoping this will go away as I make closer friends.  I'm so tired of feeling lonely. 

4.) How did you choose the college you're going to out of so many to choose from?

I was horribly torn for the longest time about where I was going to go.  I was stuck between a tiny private university with only a few thousand students or a giant school like Texas A&M with fifty thousand students.  I was so afraid that I would pick the wrong school and not go where God wanted me to go.  For the longest time, I planned to go to Hardin-Simmons.  Interestingly enough, even though I felt fairly confident that that was where I was going to go, there was still a little part of me that was hesitant.  Something didn't feel quite right.  When people asked, I didn't feel very proud of the fact that I was going to HSU, even though it's a great school.  I felt almost a little embarrassed, like it wasn't the right one for me.  When I visited for the second time during spring of my senior year, I didn't feel at home at all. 

It was really all Texas A&M's fault, you know.  I never, never, never wanted to go there and when my dad finally asked me to visit once, I agreed just to satisfy him.  The second I stepped onto campus, a smile lit up my face.  It was the week of the big game between Texas A&M and Tech, so the whole town was full and bustling.  I got to attend a Midnight Yell.  I saw the Corps walking around with their loud spurs.  I heard everyone greet me with a friendly, "Howdy."  I fell in love.  After visiting Texas A&M in October, it took me several months to make an absolute decision, but in my heart, I knew it was where I wanted to go.

When picking a college, be sure to visit.  Take pictures, see how friendly everyone is, and try to envision yourself living there and walking around on campus.  If you can't imagine yourself living there happily, then it isn't the school for you.  If you're stuck between two or three schools like I was, make a list of pros and cons.  They'll help you out a lot. 

My cons for Texas A&M was that it was so huge and I am not used to going to a large school.  Also, Texas A&M was ten hours away from my hometown, which was much further than what I wanted.  Plus, I'd always expected I would attend a private Christian university.  After all, I was either home schooled or I attended a Christian school my entire life.  How would I fit in to a secular state school like Texas A&M? 

However, the pros outweighed the cons.  I loved the people in Aggieland.  They're all so nice and friendly and helpful.  There are a lot of Christian organizations like Impact and Campus Crusade for Christ and Breakaway and Baptist Student Ministries (and so many more) where I could plug in.  I felt proud to be an Aggie, like that's what I was supposed to be.  I saw a huge mission field in Aggieland.  Christians are a minority, even though it was a conservative school.  There were so many broken and hurting students, just like I once was.  I knew I could reach out to them and try to make a difference in their lives.  There are a lot of traveling abroad opportunities at Texas A&M.  There will be many interning opportunities as well.  And finally, I just felt like the Lord was tugging at my heart.  For some reason, He wants me at Texas A&M.  Even though I'm lonely and it's hard to be so far away from my family, I feel like I should be here.  I don't even want to be here a lot of the time--I want to be home.  But I can feel the Lord whispering to me.  This is where I need to be right now, even when it's hard. 

If you're going to college in a year or two, one of the biggest pieces of advice I have for you is to keep your mind open.  Don't just visit one kind of school, like only a private university or only a state school.  Visit a large variety and keep your heart wide open to what God might have in store for you.  I never wanted to attend a giant state school, but look where I am... and I love Texas A&M.  The Lord might want you to attend a school you never even considered until now.

5.) Is it weird going from a small school to a HUGE one?

It's been very weird.  It's the strangest feeling to have different people in every single classroom.  One weird thing is how big the campus is.  It's like a small town.  To take some classes, people have to ride bikes or take shuttles because it's too far to walk!  It's a fifteen minute walk from one of my classes to the other.  At my high school, everyone knew each other and it was only a few feet away from one class to the next.  Here, nobody knows anyone, you have to work hard to get connected, and it's probably best to bring a map everywhere you go at first. 

6a.) How is going to a secular school different from coming from a Christian high school?

At my Christian high school, there were definitely pretenders who weren't actually Christians and who probably didn't even believe in God.  There were kids who smoked and drank and slept around and even did drugs.  However, the vast majority of everyone around me was a Christian.  And the "bad" kids seemed more segregated in a little group.  I wasn't around them that much.

Here, I'm the minority.  Nearly everyone I meet cusses and drinks and sleeps around.  It's considered normal.  I'm the one who is considered weird and segregated a little from the rest.  To be honest, I think the cussing has been the worst part.  I can avoid places where people drink and party, but everyone seems to cuss, even the teachers.  And when I mention that I'm a Christian, I often get strange looks like, "...Why?"  Either that, or I get rolled eyes and grimaces.  Oh great, someone here to judge me.  I hope I can change that mindset.

I'm used to having Christian values taught in the classroom and here, they're not.  Before I dropped Psychology, the professor frequently talked about evolution and even wanted us to write a paper about it.  Most of my professors curse or talk about religion (and my political views) in derogatory ways.  I'm used to having teachers who will pray over me and minister to me.  That's been a bit of a change.

6b.) How do you like it?

In some ways, I don't like it.  It's a big change and it can be hard when I feel like one of the only Christians here.  However, I'm starting to not mind being the minority so much anymore.  What a huge mission opportunity this is!  So many people around me are lonely and hurting.  It's become a game of sorts to casually mention my faith in every conversation I have, whether or not it's talking about church or trying to find the right Bible study for me or a Christian song I listen to... I've been trying to invite some people to visit churches with me as well.  I think it's so important for Christians to keep attending state schools and not only private Christian schools.  So many people have a negative view of Christians.  We can change that.

6c.) How are you adjusting to the difference?

I'm trying to adjust myself more to the cussing.  It's not that I want to become deaf to it, but at this point, I feel myself physically cringe every time somebody swears around me.  When I was in high school, I retaught myself to hate the sound of swearing, but now I may hate it enough to let it physically affect me the more I hear it.  I need to let it go a little bit and be able to bear it more than I do now without participating in it myself, if that makes any sense.

The best way to adjust that I've found so far is to try to get involved in Christian activities.  I may be a minority in my faith here, but there are still thousands of Christians.  It isn't such a lonely feeling when I surround myself some of the time with those who believe like I do.  I'm trying hard to make some Christian friends so we can encourage each other.

7.) Overall, how do you feel about college so far?

At this moment, I'll be honest and say that I'm struggling a little.  I don't like feeling lonely and I don't like being away from my family, since we're very close.  I feel so far away from everyone I love and the schoolwork has been a little overwhelming.  I'm not making close friends as quickly as I hoped I would.  However, I keep reminding myself that even though I feel homesick, it's going to be okay.  God is in control and He's taking care of me through all of these hard feelings.  It's been hard, but I'm okay.  I'm surviving.  And I hope that after these first few weeks, I'll grow to love being on my own. 

This is day two of the College Q&A.  Tomorrow I'll be posting about college in general (how I chose it, what it's like, etc.), so if you have any more questions about that, you can ask them up until the end of tonight. 

Today's topics are about dorm life, friendships, and organizations.

What is the food like?

As you're about to see, I got a lot of questions about food. 

College food isn't actually so bad.  I live in an off campus dorm, however, so I'm not sure how on-campus food is.  We have our own cafeteria.  There is a grill, where you can ask to have multiple foods made for you, like chicken quesadillas, grilled cheese sandwiches, Philly cheese steaks, hamburgers, and more.  There is a homecooked food bar, which usually has veggies, rolls, tilapia or chicken, and other main courses.  There is a sandwich bar and a salad bar.  There is an oriental bar which has pizza, Asian food, or a smoothie bar where you can pick out your favorite fruits and they'll blend them into a smoothie.  There is an ice cream bar with real ice cream, not the soft serve stuff, and a multitude of toppings.  There is even a dessert bar, filled with cakes and pies.  There are two slushie makers, about twenty different fountain drinks to choose from, different types of vitamin water (like watermelon, kiwi, strawberry, etc.), and the occasional chocolate fountain.  Crazy, right?  It's going to be tough to not gain those freshman fifteen!

I tend to take pictures of my meals with my phone and send them to my mom because she likes to know if I'm getting proper nutrition. ;)  I'll share a couple of those pictures throughout today's post. 

What kind of stuff are you eating?

I'm very picky.  I usually eat a salad along with a quesadilla or a grilled cheese sandwich (with a little plate of deli turkey on the side for protein) or a homecooked meal.  I'll occasionally bring a Lunchable along with me to school and eat that.  I have some canned soups and things in my suite, so if I don't feel like getting out, I'll have that for dinner instead.  My parents pay for a few groceries, so I have some fruit in the fridge and some cereal and snacks in my own little cabinet, which is nice.

Where do you prepare your food?

I don't prepare most of my food.  The cafeteria will prepare it for me.  I have a meal plan where I have fourteen meals a week paid for in the cafeteria.  (I usually eat breakfast in my own room.)  I'm not sure if this is how it is in all cafeterias, but I think they have this in several: they will even bag a lunch for me if I have to go off campus during lunch time. 

Occasionally if I don't feel like going to the cafeteria, I'll prepare a sandwich or soup in my suite.  We have some cabinets, a little countertop, a microwave, and a fridge that all came with the suite.  I don't know if your dorm will come with these things, but it would definitely be a worthwhile buy to get a fridge and a microwave if not.  I've used them both quite a bit.  One thing I wish my suite has would be a sink in the little mini-kitchen area.  It feels a little strange to have to go to the restroom down the hall to rinse out my dishes or add water to my soup.

Are you enjoying the food?

Mostly, yes.  Since I'm very picky (and a creature of habit), I've begun to feel a little tired of getting the same old things in the cafeteria every day, but I have to remind myself that I'm very blessed to have as high quality of a cafeteria as I do have.  Perhaps I need to start branching out and try different kinds of food.

For those of you who will be going to college in a year or two, just expect that you'll get tired of the cafeteria food, high quality or not.  It will never be as good as the food back home, but it will be enough.

I remember very clearly what I was doing, where I was, what I thought and felt when I first found out about what was happening on 9/11.  I remember watching the towers fall live on television, as I was home schooled back then and had been doing my schoolwork on the living room floor.  I remember seeing confusion and fear on my mother's face, even though she tried to hide it.  I remember seeing injured and dying people being carried away on the television, seeing reporters talk about those who were screaming for help beneath the rubble.   

Actually, the thing I remember the most clearly from everything about 9/11 would have to be a video montage I saw a couple of days later.  The video consisted of photographs of people leaping from the buildings.  I remember asking my dad what they were doing and when he replied that they were committing suicide, I felt extremely confused and distressed. 

At nearly nine years old, I didn't understand the concept of murder, suicide, hatred, grief.  I had never experienced death before.  And even though I lived across the nation from New York City, I felt unbearable grief after the towers were attacked. 

9/11 changed my life in many ways.  I can't imagine how much it changed the lives of those who lost loved ones that day.

I can't believe it's been ten years.

My heart fills with strength when I log onto Facebook, Yahoo News, look outside and see the sea of flags...  America hasn't forgotten and I don't think it ever will.  An attack that was supposed to tear us apart has instead brought an entire nation together.  Today, I haven't seen articles about democrats or republicans or politics.  I've seen unity, strength, and reverence.

I admire that.

Today is part one of the three-part College Q&A.  On Monday, I'll be answering questions about college social life (finding churches, organizations, making friends, being homesick, etc.) and on Wednesday, I'm answering questions about "college" in general (adjusting to size difference, favorite part, hardest part, etc).  I will still take questions for those topics, so if you are just now discovering this Q&A day and you have some questions, you can go ahead and ask them in the comments below.

I hope this helps you get a glimpse of what college life is like. :)

What classes are you taking?

As of right now, I'm taking: College Algebra, Self Defense, English Literature, American Sign Language, and Texas Government.

I am taking fourteen hours.  I started out taking seventeen, but became too overwhelmed with the sheer amount of homework and dropped out of Psychology before the second week was finished.  It was one of the best decisions I have made about my scheduling so far.  I feel so much less overwhelmed now that I have a little more time.  My schedule has become a bit more relaxed and I'm finally able to participate in some social activities.

What is your daily class schedule like?

I got pretty lucky with my schedule, I think.  My first class on Mondays and Wednesdays is at noon.  My last class ends in the early evening.  On Tuesdays and Thursdays, I have to be in the classroom at 9:10 and my last class ends at 1:15.  I don't have any classes on Friday.  Nice, right?  It is wonderful to have a three day weekend so I can study and also have fun with friends and get-togethers.

What's a normal day like for you?/On a typical day, what would your schedule look like?

I've gotten a few variations of this question, so I hope this isn't too confusing for me to describe.

Well, Mondays and Wednesdays are similar and Tuesdays and Thursdays are similar as well.  If it's a school day, I'll wake up somewhere between seven and eight in the morning and eat a bowl of cereal in my room.  On Mondays and Wednesdays, I'll study, do homework, etc. until it's time to leave for my first class around eleven.  On Tuesdays and Thursdays, I'll get ready for school and leave right away.  On Mondays and Wednesdays, I have an hour to return and eat lunch.  On Tuesdays and Thursdays, I wait until my last class is over.  (Occasionally I will stay and get tutoring for algebra and I might bring a sack lunch then.)

Whenever I get home from my classes, I usually rest for a little while, possibly take a nap, and then go eat dinner in the cafeteria.  The place where I'm staying has a great cafeteria, so I have several healthy food choices to choose from... and some not-so-healthy ones, like the occasional chocolate fountain, daily ice cream bar, and pie/cake bar.  Ahh! 

I spend the evening finishing up homework, studying, and I might watch an episode of a TV show like "Lost."   I usually go to bed around midnight or one in the morning.

On Fridays, I don't have class, so I'll possibly go in for more math tutoring, run some errands, grocery shop, and etc.  I plan some social activities with friends over the weekend as well.  I can sleep in on Fridays and Saturdays, which is verryyyy nice.  On Sunday mornings, I am visiting churches, although I hope to find one church I like very soon.  I also haven't joined any organizations yet, but now that I've cut down the number of hours I'm taking, I hope to join a couple of Christian Bible studies of some sort.

There are also other little activities I spread out through the week, like laundry on Tuesdays and Wednesdays, letter writing on Sundays, Skyping just about every day with various people, and cleaning Charlie's fish bowl on Sundays.  I keep a lot of lists and planners to help myself stay organized... otherwise, I'll forget everything I need to do because there is so much.

What are your classes like?

This is another question I got more than once and I remember wondering this same thing, so I'll be sure to elaborate. 

My classes are each very different.  I was actually a bit surprised at how similar the classroom structures were to my high school classes.  I'm not exactly sure what I expected them to be like, but they still feel like school.  And class.  And fairly normal.  The strangest parts (coming from someone who graduated from a class in the low forties) are: I have different people in every single class, I'll be switching out all my teachers in a few months, and most of the professors don't really care that much whether or not I try hard.

I would always hear people say that professors don't care whether or not their students do well, but it's a bit different than that.  The attitudes I'm getting are more like this: If you try hard, then I will do as much as I can to help you succeed.  If you are unmotivated, then I don't really care if you flunk out.  In fact, I hope you do.  In high school, my teachers were all very concerned that everyone passed, motivated or not.  In fact, they were willing to go to great lengths to make sure that everyone did well. 

My class that is the most like a stereotypical college class would have to be Texas Government.  There are about eighty people sitting in a refurbished movie theatre and it's my biggest class by far.  The professor has a very, "I'm going to make my tests hard, so if you don't study, you will fail and I don't care," attitude, and each day, he stands in front of the class and gives a lecture.  What is interesting is the fact that he is very attentive to our needs if we work hard.  He has reached out to me and helped me with a project in that class already, even seeing me outside of class hours and helping me with an idea, because I have shown that I care about doing well in his class.  For those who sit in the back and don't ask any questions, he doesn't seem to care much about how well they do at all.

Self defense is my easiest class.  One day of the week is working out (and so far, we aren't doing a whole lot in that area) and one day of the week is a lecture.  Like every professor I have so far, he uses a power point presentation where he gives us notes to write down.  My professor is more of a coach than an intellectual, so he enjoys showing us funny YouTube videos about self defense throughout the lecture.

Algebra is my hardest class by far.  My professor is very eccentric and she seems to expect us to know most of the material already.  I typically have several hours of homework each week, equaling out to around a hundred problems, which can be very overwhelming.  My professor will stand up and lecture and work a few problems before leaving us with quite a bit of written and online homework, but she doesn't explain them as well as I'd like.  I will probably have to get a lot of tutoring to do well in this class.

English Literature is a fairly small class and I also happen to be the only freshman, which shakes things up a bit.  We have to read... a lot, which I assumed would be the case.  The professor expects us to have the literature read before we come into class and then we will analyze each piece.  It's a bit more liberal than I thought it would be, even though I attend a very conservative school.  So far, the class discussed women's lib and the problems with religion quite a bit.  Kind of a disappointment, but I am learning a lot about how to analyze literature.  At times, the reading material can be a little overwhelming, but the class is manageable.

My very favorite class would have to be American Sign Language.  My professor is actually completely deaf.  He doesn't speak, so he only communicates with us through signs.  Surprisingly, even though this is only an introduction to ASL, he is very easy to understand and I have learned so much from him.  There is a lecture (yes, there really is!), we practice vocabulary, we have games where we mirror each other or make silly faces, and then we usually act out conversations or watch educational tapes that feature signing conversations.  The class is a little over two hours long since it also has a lab.  I suppose the "normal" class part would be the lecture and the "lab" part would be acting out what we've learned.  The professor is very, very nice and helpful and funny.  ASL would have to be the most enjoyable class I've ever attended.  I'm truly starting to gain a passion for sign language and I can't wait to learn more. 

Are you liking your classes so far?

So far, yes.  My least favorite is algebra because it is confusing and involves an overwhelming amount of homework, but overall, I enjoy attending my classes.  I honestly look forward to ASL each week because it's so much fun and I learn so much without even realizing it.  Classes like Texas Government, English Literature, and Self Defense are more like "ugh, school," but I don't dread them.  They just feel like... class.

How does your schoolwork differ from when you were in high school?

In high school, I never really had to do much homework or studying.  I could get just about everything done during class hours.  In college, things seem to be the opposite.  I don't get anything done but a lecture during class and I'm expected to do all of the work and studying on my own time.  It's a difficult switch to get used to... believe me, I have had class for a couple of weeks and I'm still not quite used to the way things work.

Also, you're not babied as much.  If you forget to do an assignment, there isn't any lenience.  You're given a zero without a second thought.  The professors don't remind you that an assignment is due the following week.  They give you a syllabus with an assignment sheet and that's how you know when everything is due. 

There are fewer grades in college as well.  In high school, I would often have a test about every two weeks and sometimes a couple of quizzes each week.  For my college classes, I have only about three exams per semester and five or six quizzes.  Some classes have more homework grades than others.  Some have hardly any homework grades.  For the ones that have only a few grades each semester, you have to study hard to make sure you do well on those exams. 

Are your classes harder than you thought they would be?

Yes.  People told me over and over that I would have to learn to study and be overwhelmed at first, but I have to admit that I didn't quite believe them.  I'm an academic person.  I tend to enjoy learning and schoolwork.  It comes easily to me and I've never had to study for things before.  As I've begun college, I've come to realize that I do have to study to do well, and since I never had to study before, I'm having to learn how for the first time.

The biggest change has been the immense level of homework I have each week: reading in every single class, multiple worksheets in math, projects in several classes, and vocabulary words for ASL.  I'm having to re-learn time management, which I had covered in high school. 

Are your classes different than you thought they would be?

I didn't expect them to be so small and intimate.  My biggest class has eighty people.  The second biggest has about forty people.  All of the others seem to have around thirty students each.  I always thought I would take freshman classes with several hundred classmates, but everything has been surprisingly cozy. 

I also didn't expect to form any sort of relationship with the professors and I have begun to get to know several of them. 

I didn't expect my classes to have the feel of normal school, which I think I mentioned above.  You walk into class with your backpack.  You set out your notes and text book and pencils.  No texting is allowed.  No whispering is allowed.  The students around you are your peers.  The teacher will occasionally give announcements or make corny jokes.  It feels like school has always felt and for some reason, I always thought college would have some sort of an overwhelming adult feel about it.  It's almost a relief that it doesn't. 

----------------------------------------------

I hope this has answered some of your questions about college classes. 

If you're also a college student (or you've been there and done that a while back) and you have some more tips to add, go ahead and do so in the comments below.  I'm a new college student, so I may not have covered everything important.

Right before I left to go to college, I went to the doctor to get a shot. 

I may be eighteen, but I still go to a pediatrician.  The fact that I go to a pediatrician at eighteen never really hit me as being strange until this summer, when my dentist kicked me out because I was too old for his practice.  I had to switch to a dentist for adults.  That horrified me a little.  I'm a baby when it comes to doctors and dentists.  I'm afraid of being poked and prodded and it helps a lot when there are sweet nurses and stickers and prizes for being good.   :)

Visiting the adult dentist wasn't as bad of an experience as I thought it would be, but I was still afraid that my doctor would kick me out as well.  After all, I was about to leave for college, I'm legally an adult, I finished growing eight years ago...  But much to my relief, my doctor reassured me that he would keep me as his patient until I finished college. 

I was very happy that I could keep the same doctor, and I still am.  I don't mind the fact that I see a pediatrician.

But anyway, I had to get a shot the day before I left for college.  Like always, I sat in the waiting room for about fifteen minutes, ready to be called in for my shot.  While I waited, something struck me. 

This may be a long shot, but perhaps by the time I graduate college, waiting rooms like these will cause enough embarrassment that I will be quite willing to switch to a family doctor.

I guess we'll see. :)

For those of you who have been asking what college is like, I'm having a Q&A day about it on September 10, so leave your specific questions in the comments below or email them to me at jacksfavoriteowner@yahoo.com.

Ever since I knew fish were allowed in my dorm, I was determined to get a betta fish. 

The day after I moved into my dorm, we went to Petco and began to look over the many bettas available.  They looked pitiful in their tiny cups, but one fish caught my eye.  He seemed like he was nearly every color of the rainbow: purple, blue, green, red... and he was very active, swimming all about in his little cup.  I fell in love with him at once.

I named my new charge Charlie after the character from the TV show "Lost."  Charlie from Lost was made to be a WONDERFUL friend.  He would have done anything for his best friend Claire and he ultimately did make the greatest sacrifice of all.  I figured that Charlie was to be my first friend in college (and my only roomie), so I would name him after the best fictional friend I ever saw.

Now, I'm no fish expert, but according to what I read, Charlie is a male multi-colored veiltale, for those of you who are interested whatsoever.  He's a very active little guy.  He chases my finger when I wave it around his mini-aquarium, he flares his fins at the red light on my camera, and he covers the top of his cage with bubble nests.

Charlie is gorgeous, isn't he?

I'll admit...  Sometimes when I'm feeling lonely or homesick, I'll pretend in a way that Charlie is actually my roommate.  I'll walk through the door, throw my bags on the ground, and say, "Sorry I got home so late, buddy.  This guy stopped me in the hall and we started talking.  Homework will be a killer and..."  I think I might be going somewhat crazy.

Charlie is a good listener though.  He's so pretty.  I love it when he swims beneath his light, because his fins ripple with color.

Funny story.  I was eating lunch with Ali a few weeks ago and I told her, "I'm so excited to go to college and get my new betta BFF."  Well, Ali had apparently never heard of a betta before, so she thought I was talking about joining a sorority of some sort and finding a new BFF there. 

Ali and I definitely want each other to make a bunch of college best friends.  We are sisters, so our relationship will never diminish simply because we grow close to others as well.  My uncle told me once that love isn't like water in a bucket.  You don't pour some here and some there until the bucket is empty.  Love is a cup that never runs empty.  In this way, Ali and I can have many wonderful friends and we will still love each other just as much.  However, if you can imagine, having your best friend excitedly talk about running to college and making a BFF right away, it can seem a little... sad, in a way. 

Ali smiled and said, "Great!" but her reaction was a little less exuberant than I expected.

The next day when my mom and Ali and I were eating out, I mentioned again, "I wonder where I'll go to get my betta BFF." 

Ali said something like, "Why Beta?"  She still thought I was planning to join some sorority named Beta and find a best friend there.  (I don't even think there IS a sorority called Beta.)

I chuckled.  "Because they're small, pretty, and easy to maintain.  I'm so excited."

At this point, we both began to realize we weren't talking about the same thing.  I proceeded to explain to Ali that a betta is a fish and we both had a good laugh afterwards.

Today I'll share with you my dorm room.  I'm pretty excited about it.  I worked hard to add new touches and bring things from home to create the perfect environment for my writing and relaxation.  Black and white, Elvis, Ted Dekker books, Africa... and my room is complete. 

When I left, my mom's van was packed full of my stuff... and I even had a few more things in the back of my own car!  I've been asked to elaborate a little on what I used for storage.  Honestly, my ways probably weren't very conventional.  We used paper sacks, random duffle bags and suitcases, and a few Wal-Mart boxes (you can get them for free if you ask at night).  We also got two large tubs and filled them with a school year's worth of toiletries so I wouldn't have to worry about buying them as a poor college student. ;)  Basically, if something I owned could hold some of my belongings (like a trashcan), then that's what we used for storage.  No big plastic tubs for us, although that might have been nice!

It's a strange feeling to see everything you own stuffed into the back of a car.  A little bittersweet.

Moving in was pretty easy.  At first when I caught a glimpse of my dorm room, it seemed small and cramped, but after we moved the furniture around a bit and put the cabinet under my bed instead of up against the wall, I was amazed at how much the little room opened up.

Obviously, the most important part of my bedroom is my bed.  I got my comforter and pillow case from Bed Bath and Beyond.  I brought two normal pillows and a body pillow.  I also have a decorative pillow, but I usually keep that on my beanbag.  The fuzzy blue throw also comes from Target.  It's very soft and comes in several different colors.  I got my curtains from Target.  Since my room faces the east, I need dark curtains to keep from being forced awake by the bright morning sun!

As you can see, I did some Elvis decorating over my bed as well.  Thanks, Ali, for the Elvis records.  The poster is from Universal Studios in Florida.  At the end of my bed, I keep my guitar case, my laundry basket, and a trashcan, where nobody can see!

Next to my bed is a really neat nightstand.  It's circular, so it doesn't have to sit against a wall.  It's from Bed Bath and Beyond and I believe it was about twenty dollars.  It's small, but big enough to hold a lamp (from Bed Bath and Beyond), an alarm clock, and an iPod dock.  On the bottom stand, I keep a journal, a Bible, and a couple of devotional books.  Above my nightstand, I keep my Elvis calendar! 

My personal favorite item in my room is my beanbag.  I'd been searching for beanbags online and in my hometown for the past three or four months.  Everything I found was either too big, too small, uncomfortable, or wayyyy too expensive.  While we were shopping at Bed Bath and Beyond for some last minute room supplies, we stopped at a store called Pier 1, which had some furniture and house decorations.  Plopped on the floor was a big, squishy, fluffy BEANBAG!  It was a hundred dollars, which is a pretty good price for a beanbag of that size.  The only downer was the fact that it didn't come in black, only brown.

However, the color difference was worth it.  I had a beanbag!  We purchased the beanbag, carried it out in a giant box and then had to end up cutting the box away because it wouldn't fit in my car!  I was happy as a clam.  I purchased a small decorative torquoise blue pillow to blend the big brown beanbag into the rest of my room.

The rug is from Target.  It's extremely soft and comes in two or three different colors, so be sure to check it out.  It definitely brightened up my room and makes sitting on my beanbag especially comfortable whenever I decide to put my feet on the floor.

The awesome black wall decoration is from The Container Store, which has a lot of great dorm room accessories.  The "faith, hope, and love" wire words were from my mom.  To the far left of the picture is a black and white bulletin board of sorts which holds pictures of my friends, family, and from Africa.

My desk area is pretty hectic, so I took a few close-up shots so I could highlight a few items.  But here's the entire area.  Pretty crazy, I know.  This was taken the day I was still moving in, so my desktop wasn't completely sorted through yet.

The bookshelf is another one of my favorite things in my room.  We ordered it off of Overstock.com.  It's called a spine bookshelf and it's made to look like the books are in a giant stack rather than placed in actual shelves.  I love the look and this is my new favorite bookshelf of all times.  I'm still waiting for a few more books I ordered to come in and after that, my stack will be complete!

Actually, someone came into my room the other day and said, "Girl, I need to get you a bookshelf so you won't have this big stack!"  And then she realized that it was a bookshelf.  Perhaps I'm too easily entertained. :)

Above my desk are my typical decorations.  The giant wire letters that say "EMILY" from Pottery Barn, the Elvis Presley Blvd road sign that used to hang above my bedroom door at home, some more Elvis and Beatles records...  And you can also see the "film strip" picture holder hanging from the wall.  I had that back at home too and I love it.  The cute little TV is from my Nawnie. 

What's nice is that the back of my desk is magnetic.  I had already gotten several little magnets, so I was able to hang some Elvis postcards and pictures of friends on the back of my desk.  The little containers are from... where else?  The Container Store.  Since this picture was taken, I also got a wire magnetic cup holder from Target.

The fan is from Target.  It was inexpensive, easy to work, and lightweight.  I love it so far.  If you're living in a dorm room, I definitely recommend a small fan like the one I have.  It's helped out a lot, whether blocking noise or cooling off a stuffy room.  As you can see, I've gotten myself a little friend from Petco (I'll write a separate blog post about him on Sunday), so he sits on the corner of my desk.  We chat frequently.  I also keep pictures of all of my siblings on my desk.  The neat pictures/picture frames are from Shutterfly.

Okay, the other side of my desk looks incredibly messy, but it isn't that way anymore.  I didn't currently have a jewelry holder, so it all sat on my paper holder, which now contains all of my blog calendars and notes.  The black strip is actually magnetic and very handy for holding keys and pictures and notes.  I got it at the Container Store.  I made the calendars at Shutterfly.  The lamp is from Target.  Yes, I do have a Bobble and I've quite enjoyed it.  And I think that's just about all on that side of the desk. 

Finally, here is a glimpse of my room in all its entirety (well, minus the bed).  From this angle, you can see the mirrored closet, the map of Africa, my acoustic guitar, and my other laundry bag hanging from the door.  I now have my necklaces hanging from a hook on that wall, along with my fuzzy robe.  When winter comes, I'll probably hang a coat on that wall as well.  In this picture, I'm posing with my grandma, who came to visit me on move in day.  (Not the most flattering picture of me, but oh well!  Keep your eyes on the room!) ;)

On the August 16, Mom, Ali, and I woke up early and began the six hour drive to take Ali to college.  It was very bittersweet since we all knew that we'd have to say goodbye in only a few days.  Ali's car was packed.  Her belongings were piled up to the ceiling.  In fact, we had to move some of her things into my car so I'd have enough room to fit into her passenger seat.  I wish I would have taken a picture of Ali's. 

It's a strange feeling to see all of your belongings--the material expression of "you"--fit into the back of a small car.

Ali and I sang and made up dances to fun songs almost the entire way to her new city, even during rush hour traffic... which wasn't as crazy as we had heard it would be.  At times, it was hard to keep from being emotional. This was it.  After being inseparable, seeing each other every single day (often for most of every day) for over a year, we were about to be separated until possibly Thanksgiving.

Needless to say, a few tears were shed.

Now don't worry.  Ali and I will definitely still keep in touch.  We already text/Skype/Facebook/write letters/or talk on the phone to each other every single day.  And since we're sisters, we'll get to spend every holiday together.

It's just for now, without each other, life is going to be very, very different.  I know that can be a good thing... but... it's also a sad and scary thing. 

We had one evening together before we had to move Ali in and leave her to her orientation at her school.  We went to Texas Roadhouse and had a yummy meal.  We bought snacks (almonds and raisins, Ali's favorites) from Wal-Mart, and then we went to Bed Bath and Beyond to pick out pillows.

Ali tends to be a little... forgetful, so she ended up forgetting BOTH of her pillows, her straightener, and most of her shampoos and such back at home.  The most immediate problem was a pillow, since she didn't have one.  I had brought one pillow to school, but I needed another (I love pillows), so we decided to begin our search together.

We're both very picky when it comes to pillows.

Cotton pillows don't do.  They're too plain.  Most feather pillows either flatten too easily or make us sneeze.  We don't like memory foam (it's too hard).  We like soft, squishy pillows.  Some down pillows work.  Some don't.

After quite a while of searching, wandering away from each other at times to try out certain pillows, we met up together... with the same pillow!  So now at night whenever we're feeling lonely and sad, we can hug our pillows and think of each other.  (Am I feeling sentimental or what?)

When it came time to leave to take Ali to school the next morning, dread seemed to hang in the air.  The "Big Goodbye" was about to happen.  We were about to be separated for two months.  We listened to "I Miss You" by Shane & Shane in the car together, over and over again.

Ali was a little... upset that the moment had finally come.  She hugged her new pillow the whole way.

The next morning, we had to move Ali into her dorm room at school.  She's actually sharing a room with two other girls, which I find crazy!  Ali has to sleep on a top bunk that is so close to the ceiling, I in all of my shortness can't even sit up straight.  However, the room is very cute and cozy and all three girls chose black and white patterns for their beds. 

I'll now share some much-requested photographs of Ali's dorm room.  I didn't take pictures of the ENTIRE thing because I wasn't sure if her roommates would appreciate pictures of their living quarters posted all over the internet.

Funny story... Ali called me a week or two ago saying that there was nobody at her new school to blog about her.  I replied, "Oh, Ali, I'll ALWAYS blog about you!"  My mom just sat on her bed in the hotel room, shaking her head and laughing silently.

First of all is Ali's bed.  It may be high-up, but it's super cute.  Ali was given the bedspread, which I actually LOVE, possibly even more than my (and it's perfect for her!).  Black, white, and yellow were her colors.  The fuzzy throw is way soft.  You can get the same one from Target.  I got a teal-colored throw for my own dorm room.  You can also see Ali's new pillow in a yellow pillowcase, a small decorative pillow (she realllly likes yellow), and a zebra-print decorative arm pillow.  Way cozy!

Ali got her own desk, which is great.  She decorated a bulletin board with ribbon, fabric, and a flower or two.  It's way cute, right?  Ali actually brought THREE teddy bears, which I couldn't stop teasing her about.  She also was sure to cover her desk with pictures of her families.  :)

The calendar you see on the top shelf is something I made at www.shutterfly.com.  I have one as well.

(The girl on the bottom bunk actually has the same comforter as I do!)

It was very difficult to say goodbye to Ali.  We were hoping to be able to go out to dinner one more time and talk and laugh... or even have a thirty or forty minute goodbye period, but we didn't.  When Ali went to the front desk to check into her dorm, she asked what time we were supposed to say goodbye and they said, "Uh, right now."

Mom, Ali, and I went to the bathroom for a few minutes.  We all cried and embraced and clung to each other.  Then we walked Ali to the auditorium and waved goodbye. 

It's been a couple of weeks now and I miss Ali like CRAZY.  I wish I could see my sissy every day again.

A few more weeks, Emily.  Just a few more weeks.

Well, do you like what you saw of Ali's dorm room?  Do you have any space-saving tips?

By the way, for those of you who have been asking what college is like, I'm having a special college Q&A day on September 10.  Leave your questions in the comments or email them to me at jacksfavoriteowner@yahoo.com by September 9.  And if you have a specific question for Ali, say so and I'm sure she'd be willing to give an answer as well. ;)

I've had quite a few questions from readers over the last week or two, saying, "What's college like?  Tell me about the college experience."  I used to ask the same thing.  Now I understand why college students would always hesitate when I asked and say, "Well... it's... college," like that's some sort of reasonable explanation.  I know I haven't been very detailed about my recent experiences on this blog and I'm sorry about that.  I know that not only my readers who don't "know" me would like to see some of what's going on in my life right now, but my family and friends would too.

Now, I do have a calendar to help me plan out my blog ahead of time and I have "my dorm room pictures" scheduled for September 2 and "Ali's dorm room pictures" scheduled for September 1, so that's coming up soon.  But dorm room pictures don't really show what it's like here. 

To be honest, things haven't been easy.  It's tough to move ten hours away from everyone you know and love.  It's tough to be forced to make brand new friend groups and live in a brand new place.  My life has not been easy the last week and that's partly why I haven't had a whole lot to say about it.  Everything is just so new. 

When you have to start over with friend groups, even when you start to finally find some friends, they're simply not close friends yet... and they won't be close friends until some time has passed and you've shared some experiences together.  Unfortunately, that means the first few weeks--or even months--of living on your own can be pretty lonely at times.  At this point, I'm at the awkward stage.  There are some great girls and guys I've met who seem Christlike and friendly and nice, but we don't really know each other that well yet.  So while we're friendly and I enjoy spending time with each of them, things are still a little weird for everyone.

Plus, it's tough being away from family.  I miss having my parents around.  I miss Ali.  I miss my little brother and sister.  I miss my doggies.  I miss my grandparents.  I miss my old bedroom.  I miss everything about my "old life." 

But anyways, after this long rant, I really am doing okay.  I'm not depressed.  I'm not even miserable.  I'm just a little lonely and ready to make some closer college friends.  I've been praying hard that God would bring some GREAT close girl friends into my life and I fully trust that He will. 

I thought since I've been getting so many questions about what college is like that I might do a special Q&A about it.  Over the next week or two, you're welcome to comment with any specific college question you might have.  It could be about some of the struggles and emotions involved or it could be about how I get around campus or what classes are like.  It's up to you.  Ask what you want and I'll answer your questions on September 10. 

Oh, and I thought I'd share one little instance from the last few days.  Look what I found in the bathroom the other night. 

That's right.  He's a lizard!

He was shockingly small.  I have very small fingers and you can see how little he is compared to them.  I don't think I've ever seen a lizard this small in my life.  At first when I saw him out of the corner of my eye, I thought he was a spider or a centipede or something and so I screamed bloody murder.  My friend and one of my suitemates both came running to make sure everything was okay.

"There's a... a... a... a lizard!" I stammered, finally realizing that there wasn't a poisonous spider in the bathroom.  Only a cute little lizard.

It didn't take long for me to catch him and put him in one of our paper Dixie cups.  Together, we all took him outside and set him free in the bushes.  He was a pretty cute little guy.

So... any questions?  Comment them below or send them to jacksfavoriteowner@yahoo.com.  I'll answer them all on September 10.

This is one of those "Get to Know You" surveys that spreads all over Facebook and Tumblr.  I took this from my bloggie friend Lissa.  You should go check out her blog.  She writes almost every day like I do and has some very interesting thoughts.

This is going to be so looooooooooooong.

Your middle name, and how you feel about it

Nicole.  I like it, even though it has turned out to be a very common middle name.  When I was younger, I used to think Nicole was a beautiful name, so I'd always name my story characters Nicole. 

Talk about your piercings or tattoos, if you have any

I don't have any tattoos.  At this point, I don't think I want one, but I may change my mind later in life.  The only piercings I have are my earlobes.  Very basic.  If I got another piercing, it would be on the cartilage of my ear, but I'm afraid it would turn into a cauliflower ear (Google it), which is what my doctor threatened would happen.  Yikes.

Your favorite television program

Lately I've been OBSESSED with watching "Lost" on Netflix.  It's the most consuming show I've ever seen in my life.  I started it and everyone laughed at me, but since then I've managed to get Rebekah, my brother, and even my mom addicted as well.

Write about your closest friend(s)

I have a wonderful group of closest friends.  I write about them on here frequently.  What's most important in a close friend to me is their faith in Jesus, moral standards, loyalty, and positivity.  I love being around positive people.

Tell us your 5 favorite colors

Black, white, blue, gray (I'm serious), and purple.

Your favorite season, and why?

I love summer.  I'm incredibly cold-natured, which is why you'll find me wearing a jacket most of the time, even in summer.  I was often teased for wearing long jeans and a winter jacket where I worked when everyone else wore shorts and a t-shirt.  I don't know why I'm always so cold, but I am.  Even my hands are always cold.  Whenever I'm on my computer, I'm usually wrapped up in a blanket and a multitude of sweatshirts.

How you came across blogging and how it has changed your life since starting? (I changed this slightly from "Tumblr" to "blogging" since that made more sense in this context)

I had access to a computer at a very, very young age.  My dream was always to have my own website.  I have a LOT of Free Webs and Brave Hosts from when I was younger.  I found one the other day that Ali and I made together when we were thirteen.  We read through the entire thing and laughed so hard.  So in a way, I've blogged for a long time.  I think the longest childhood blogging I did was when I had a "My Dear Diary" at eleven or twelve and thought that was a real website.  That lasted for a few months and then I switched to other things.

I started a blog on Weebly in November of 2009.  That Christmas, my cousin gave me a real blog.  It was one of the best Christmas gifts I've ever gotten because blogging has since then changed my life.  I'm able to write about everything and I have a place to put it.  I'm getting such positive feedback.  I love sharing my thoughts with the world.  Blogging is such a great outlet. 

Blogging is my LOVE now.  And since I have Google Ads, amazingly I'm being paid (not much, but still) for writing about my life.  It's wonderful.  I love blogging and recommend it to anyone.  I don't think I'll ever stop.

Are you a fitness guru, or a couch potato? Talk about your exercise habits.

I tend to be a couch potato since I'm not a very athletic person, but I don't want to be!  I try to exercise even when I don't want to.

Favourite Meme at the moment?

Honestly, I don't even know what that is.

Talk about your pets, or pets you would like to have?

I have a Bichon Frise named Buddy, a Boston Terrier named Boo, and my LOVE: a Miniature Yorkie named Jack.  My family also has a lazy cat named Oreo.  I'm currently in the market for a roomie fish, which I'll be sure to introduce you to later on. :)

Your favorite bands?

BANDS?  Group 1 Crew, Superchick, Newsboys uhh... I know there are more, but I'm writing this late at night, so I'm having trouble thinking.  Group 1 Crew is amazing though.  Seriously, check them out.

Your thoughts or opinions on Harry Potter

I grew up hearing that Harry Potter was satanic, but lately I've decided to see for myself.  I honestly don't see that much of a difference between HP and a book/movie like Lord of the Rings.  I plan to read the books and watch the movie this year and make my own educated decision about them.  I hate putting something down second-hand.  I've heard the books (and movies) are fantastic, so I'm pretty excited to read them.  I may write a blog post about them later on.

Your thoughts or opinions on Mean Girls

It's very funny, but very dirty.  I'm not a big fan.

Do you have any siblings?

I have a fifteen-year-old sister named Amy, a twelve-year-old brother named Luke, and a nineteen-year-old sister named Ali.

Tell us about your favorite junk food

I loooooove ice cream.  Another addiction of mine is Tostito chips.  You know, just the plain salted chips like the ones you get at restaurants.  I like fairly bland foods, so I could snack on those things all the time.  Tostito chips and vanilla ice cream is good too.  I know, weird... but good.

Your favorite Disney Princess movie

I LOOOOOOOOVE "Mulan," if she can count as a Disney princess.  She's my hero.  If not, "Aladdin" would be my second favorite. 

Your thoughts on Ugg Boots

They're ugly, but so warm.

Do you drink soda more often than milk? 

I'm addicted to soda.  It's so bad. 

The initials of your crush(es)

At this point, I don't have a crush, I'm afraid.  Maybe someday though. :)  I still wouldn't share his initials on here though.  Way to be obvious.

Do you wear glasses? If so what are they for?

I used to wear glasses.  I got them at a young age--six or so--and I ended up becoming blind as a bat, as my dad used to say.  I eventually switched to contacts, which was a big relief.  I wasn't a big fan of how I looked in most glasses.  My senior year of high school, my contacts started driving me crazy.  My eyes itched and even started to hurt.  I went to the eye doctor several times and determined that I was allergic to contacts and could never wear them again.

It was so frustrating to have to wear glasses every day for the first time in years.  I was so limited on what I could do while still being able to see.  No more swimming or water fights.  Even fixing my hair in the morning was different.

In May of this year, I got LASIK surgery.  It was one of the biggest blessings of my entire life.  I'm so thankful for that surgery.  You can't even imagine what it's like to SEE without assistance for the first time in so many years.  I don't have to worry about contacts or glasses anymore.  This surgery changed my life.  I'm so blessed.

Your favorite subject to study

English.  I love that subject.

Do you play a sport? Tell us about it. If not, talk about a different hobby you may have

I don't play a sport.  I used to be on the swim team my freshman year of high school, but I despised that sport.  It doesn't help that I don't like water.

Another hobby would be guitar.  I have been playing since I was twelve years old.  Although I'm not nearly as good as I should be after playing for nearly seven years, I still love the guitar.  Most people play the guitar for the joy of playing the guitar, but for me, it's more of a tool to help me write my songs.  So even when I play the guitar, I'm usually writing.  Funny.

Your opinions on Lady Gaga

I've been praying for her a lot lately.  My heart hurts for her.  She's such a confused, messed up, strange woman.

Tell us about the last movie you saw in theaters

Okay, so let me admit something real quick.  I'm writing this blog post about two weeks in advance.  I knew ahead of time which days I would be traveling, at Impact Camp, and moving Ali (and myself) into college, so I knew which days I probably wouldn't be available to write.  So I wrote several posts far ahead of time.  So this is being written quite a while in advance. 

So as of right now, the last movie I saw in theaters was "Captain America."  It was so good, guys.  You have to see this movie.  There weren't any cuss words other than "h-ll" used once or twice, the violence was minimal, and there were two minor kissing scenes in the entire movie.  In fact, Captain America frequently talks about how he's waiting for the right girl to come along in his life.  It was a great movie.

Tell us about the last book you read

Again, as of this far-in-advance moment, I read "Forbidden" by Tosca Lee and Ted Dekker, which is due to come out in September of this year.  It's amazing, guys.  Go pre-order it right now.  Tosca Lee and Ted Dekker are both such talented writers. 

Name one place you would love to visit one day

Australia.  I've always wanted to visit Australia.

Name your 3 favorite girl names, your 3 favorite boy names and your 3 favorite names for a pet

Girls: Charlie, Blake, Noah

Boys: Jack, Colton, Charlie

Pet (my future Yorkie): Chewy, Charlie, Baby

Yes, I really like the name Charlie.

Your first celebrity crush!

This would be Johnny Depp.  I used to love him so much in middle school.  I had two big posters of him up in my room.  I still most definitely think that Johnny Depp is good-looking.  Very good looking.  And I still make sure I go see any movie he is in.  But I wouldn't call my infatuation with him a crush anymore.  No, Elvis has taken that place in my life.  I also used to have a small crush on Billy Gilman, back in the days when I actually liked some country music. 

Your opinion on television and the show Glee

Glee: I haven't even seen one episode.

Television: I like television, so long as it doesn't consume your life.  These are the shows I enjoy: House, Pysch, Monk, Biggest Loser, Law and Order: SVU, American Idol, and Lost.  Occasionally I'll watch an episode of Dateline or America's Got Talent with my family as well.

Take a picture of yourself and post it or post the most recent picture of yourself that you can find

Haha, I cropped this picture because I was afraid for my life.  It was right after Rebekah and I drew all over Ali's face with Sharpie.  Ali happened to be making a funny face at that moment... so I don't think she'd appreciate me posting the full picture on the internet.  This isn't a very flattering picture of myself either, but I had to be honest.  This is the most recent picture of myself as of right now.  Sigh...

If you take this survey and put it on your blog, leave the link below so I can go read your answers. :)

My friends and I love shopping at thrift stores.  This might seem strange to some, but it is actually a blast.  You never know what sorts of things you will find.  Every couple of months, my friends and I go thrift store shopping to see if there are any new treasures waiting for us.

For Spirit Week in high school, we visited several different thrift stores while we searched for interesting outfits. 

Nerd day was a huge success.

Rebekah always manages to find adorable outfits that she can actually wear.  She is very talented when it comes to style.  As you see in the picture below, Rebekah found a pair of men's swim shorts from the 80's and a men's white v-neck undershirt from Wal-Mart and turned them into a cute, casual outfit, spending a few dollars on the entire thing.  I was amazed.

Of course, sometimes the clothes we try on are plain silly.  Sometimes the clothes we buy, thinking mistakenly in the store that they're cute, turn out to be too bizarre to ever wear in public.  Buying outlandish clothes can be a bit risky, but it's always a blast to try them on.

A couple of weeks ago, Ali and Rebekah and I decided to go thrift store shopping for the fun of it.  We ended up only going to one store, but it's the biggest thrift store in town, so there were a LOT of clothes racks to go through.  Some cluttered, messy thrift stores bring out the OCD in me and I can't bring myself to stay for long, but this shop was right up my alley.  All of the clothes were color-coordinated, just like my closet.

We ended up choosing more silly outfits to try on than outfits we actually LIKED.  I'm the pickiest out of everyone, probably because I have a very specific style I usually wear, although it's very simple, and I can't find clothes that usually fit within those limits.  However, I am determined to find some very cute thrift store outfits one day.  Rebekah did manage to come away with a few cute outfits, which was good.  Even Ali found a cute shirt.

One of Ali's favorite things to do is find a baggy or unflattering dress and cut it, hem it, and add buttons and bows until it is cute and stylish.  I definitely admire her creativity in this area.  On this particular day, she nearly purchased a cute black and white polka-dotted dress that looked almost like it was from the 50's.  We thought she looked adorable in the dress, but it was quite big on her and would have taken a lot of work to fix it up.  The fabric also felt strange, almost like drapes.  Ali finally decided against purchasing the dress, but now that we've seen the cute pictures, I almost wish we could go back in time so Ali could get the dress.  It looked so cute on her.

One of the best outfits of the day was something that Rebekah found: a pair of cherry red, faux-leather pants.  They were a little big, but they were very entertaining.  In them, Rebekah looked like a rock star from thirty years ago.  That was a near-purchase... definitely something any of us would wear in public. ;) 

I came across another black and white polka-dotted dress, although this one came with an incredibly stylish collar that covered my shoulders and even the tops of my arms.  I could have probably used the fabric of the collar to make a child's dress.  There were even two little pieces of foam for each shoulder to make the giant collar poof out even more than it already was.  I wear that dress daily now.  (Kidding.  I'm kidding.)

The store employees must have thought we were a little crazy since all three of us decided to share the dressing room.  But hey, what good is it to take pictures if you're all in different rooms?  It's also a lot less awkward to take silly pictures when people aren't staring at us, wondering what on earth is going on.  We had some interesting adventures in that dressing room.  It was quite entertaining.

Even though I always have trouble deciding on things to buy at thrift stores, I love shopping there with my friends.  There is never an end to the entertainment and silliness.  When we go thrift store shopping, I know we'll have a good time... and usually a couple of us will come upon a great buy and end up wearing it frequently.

If I ever find an outfit that totally works for me, I'll let you know.  Unfortunately, I don't have the same flair for re-inventing outfits like my talented friends do.  I admire that ability so much. 

I'll miss days like these.

Y: Young at Heart

(Before I start today's post, I'd like to let y'all know that I'm writing this in advance.  Right now, my mother, Ali, and I are traveling.  We'll be moving Ali into her dorm room at her school and then moving me into my dorm.  This is a big and emotional step in both of our lives.  It's going to be so hard to leave our family and each other.  Please pray for this process and for traveling safety.  Thanks, guys.)

There are so many ways I'm still young at heart.  In fact, sometimes I feel like there's no way I should be eighteen and moving out of my house right now.  I'm too little!

One way I've kept my youth is by somehow making friends with childlike people.  I don't mean this in an insulting way whatsoever.  None of my best girl friends have ever kissed a guy (and most of my guy friends have never kissed a girl!).  We all love Winnie the Pooh, Veggie Tales, and Disney animated movies.  We listen to Disney princess songs like normal music.  We have very innocent fun, like playing in the park or playing board games in my living room.  I love how innocent and childlike my friends are.

While I don't think it's good to be so sheltered that you have no idea about the real world, I do think it's fantastic to be "like a child."  That is how many of my friends are.  That's also what I strive daily to become.

Here are ten ways I've been "young" with my friends this year:

1.) We always manage to throw interesting birthday parties.  For my friend Zeek's, we threw a big party at a Japanese fast food restaurant (yummy!).  We all wore little birthday hats (he had to wear his big one all day) and took group hug and "Zeek huge smile" shots.  It was so much fun.

2.) We don't mind embarrassing ourselves sometimes for the sake of fun.  For Rebekah's birthday last year, we dressed up in tie-dye party hats and bandanas over our faces.  We sneaked into Old Navy where she was shopping, got a LOT of funny looks, and kidnapped her from behind.  After kidnapping Rebekah, we went to my house, literally had a dance party in the rain, took silly pictures in our party hats, and played "Clue" in the living room with about twelve people.  :)

3.) I prank people quite often.  Occasionally Lukie (my little brother) and I will lock Ali out of the house.

Or Rebekah, Lukie, and I will duct tape her to a column in my house.

4.) I get excited over the smallest of things, like finding a giant baby carrot in our vegetable tray.  At this particular moment, I was so excited that I made my entire family stop dinner, find the camera, and take a picture of me holding the carrot next to a normal-sized baby carrot.  This was all very delightful to my younger siblings.

5.) I dress my dogs up in cute outfits and pose them for pictures.  You've seen a lot of pictures of Jack in his sweaters and A&M jerseys, but here's a picture of my dog Boo in a fluffy winter coat.  Doesn't she look like she loves it?

6.) I play pattycake with Rebekah.

7.) I love to have picnics with my friends.  We even use a picnic basket!  We'll bring handmade sandwiches or kids' Lunchables.  I've never grown out of Lunchables.  One of my friends from work said he always thinks of me when he sees a Lunchable at the store because that's what I would bring every day for lunch!

8.) My friends and I will literally play for hours on a playground meant for little kids.  We swing, play "Lava Monster", tag, and we'll even ride the little horse see-saws.  One of the best park games is this tilting thing that kind of sways back and forth.  It doesn't go very fast, but when we're in the moment, you'd think we were on a roller coaster.

9.) Sometimes my friends and I dress up.  I try hard to look like a gangster, but I always end up looking like a little kid.  I am terrible at being tough!  However, when we went to a deli, my friend Zeek scared everyone inside.  He can totally pull off gangsta, even though he's the opposite!  You can see how he ACTUALLY dresses in the picture above.

10.) And finally, we love to play with makeup, even if we look CRAZY after we're finished.  I remember caking on a ton of makeup when I was a little girl and running up to my mom.  She started laughing and said I looked like a clown.  I was devastated, thinking I looked like a princess, when I probably DID look like a clown with bright red lipstick, blue eyeshadow, and red spots on each cheek.  I remember looking at my reflection in the mirror, thinking, "I don't see how I look so funny!"

So those are ten ways I'm youthful.  I hope I stay youthful forever!  It's so fun to be young.

How are you like a child?

X: Something X-Treme you've done

I'm a very cautious person.  While my friends speed in the car, I nervously drive the exact speed limit.  When we're outside in the dark and we hear a noise, my initial instinct is to blindly run in the opposite direction.  I'm an anxious person... but I'm working on it!

I've traveled a lot in my short lifetime, visiting about fourteen countries (including the United States).  During each trip, I usually end up doing something quite adventurous that shocks people who know me.  When I travel, it's like I lose quite a bit of my nervousness and I want to experience new and crazy things, like petting the wild cheetah in Kenya or moving in with a European host family and attending an Austrian school for a few days.  I don't mind adventure when I'm traveling, especially when I'm on a mission trip.  Of course, some things intimidate me much more than others.

Two of my worst fears are outside water and heights.  When I say outside water, I mean that I'm not afraid of swimming pools, but I'm terrified of lakes, ponds, creeks, oceans... anything outside that I can't say for sure what's inside.  When my friends decided to go on a canoe ride in the creek near Rebecca's house, it took them quite a while to convince me to crawl into that rickety canoe... even though the water was only four or five feet deep and I know how to swim very well.  I'm just afraid of water.  It's an irrational fear of mine.  (I'm the one in the blue sweatershirt, clinging desperately to the sides of the canoe.)

When I was in Mexico on a vacation with my family, we went to Xel-Ha, an outside water resort.  It's very beautiful with fun things to do like ziplining, hikes, snorkeling, and an activity that literally made me feel sick to my stomach at the name.

The Cliff of Courage.

The cliff was about twenty-seven feet tall, hanging over a lake with dark green water.  My two worst fears, mixed into one.  Immediately, I crossed that off my list of possible activities.  There was no way I would ever take the plunge off of a cliff like that.

My dad is also afraid of heights--perhaps even more so than I am--so throughout the day, we made bets with each other: "I'll jump if you jump," both thinking there was no way the other would ever dare to jump off the Cliff of Courage.  Who would willingly throw themselves off a thirty foot cliff into opaque, fish-filled water?  It was ridiculous.

All throughout the day, I had a queasy feeling in my stomach.  I attempted snorkeling and ended up clambering out of the water faster than I even thought was possible once I looked through my goggles and saw giant silver fish resembling sharks swimming beneath me.  There is no other animal that scares me more than a shark.  I knew what the last activity of the day would be.  I dreaded even climbing to the top of the cliff with the others and looking down over the murky water.

As we began the hike up the cliff, something suddenly tweaked inside of me.  The bet between me and my Dad had spread around our group and everyone was teasing us for our fear.  "I can do this," I started thinking to myself.  "I can show everyone how brave I am.  I can do this."  My fear began to subside more and more until we were at the top of the cliff and I was standing over the edge.

"I'll go first," I heard myself say as I dropped my towel to the ground.  My knees were shaking and I knew that if I stopped for even one second to think about my decision, I would never have the courage to jump into that fish-infested green water. 

I glanced at my dad, smiled at the expression of horror coming over his face, and then jumped.

The fall was quick.  All I can remember is the feeling of, "I'm gonna die.  I'm gonna die.  I'm gonna--" SPLASH!  And I hit the water.  It stung the bottoms of my feet and for a moment, I was sure I would be devoured by a mob of angry fishes.  I scrambled out of the water as fast as I could and then stood on the shore with my fists raised.  Victory!  I had jumped off the Cliff of Courage.  I faced my fears.

Hilariously, my dad never could gain the courage to jump that day.  He was very embarrassed, but just like I was afraid I would do, he waited too long to jump and psyched himself out.

Jumping off the Cliff of Courage may or may not be as extreme as strolling through the third worst slum in Africa or visiting the gas chambers in a concentration camp in Austria.  Perhaps the Cliff of Courage doesn't even seem intimidating whatsoever to most people.  I don't know.  All I know is that in my mind, it's the bravest thing I've ever done.  I faced two of my worst fears and made it out alive.

But do know that I will NOT be doing something like that again.

What is your biggest fear? Have you ever faced it?

I wrote this on October 6, 2009 after a tough day volunteering at a family homeless shelter.

---

She stumbled into the room with frightened eyes. Three young children followed at her feet, somber and bewildered. She was high as a kite and couldn't walk straight, let alone think clearly. "I just don't know what to do anymore," she mumbled, coming to sit down in a chair. "I can't stay. I need a smoke. I can't stay in here." Trembling, she took her crying toddler by the hand and rushed out of the room, ignoring the pleas of my grandmother. "I need a smoke. I'll be back later. I can't take this right now."

Her other two children sat in silence, staring at me with forlorn expressions. I spoke to them with a huge smile on my face, pretending like nothing was wrong. Like their weeping mother hadn't just fled the room, leaving a trail of confusion behind her. Like there weren't any problems.

I try to make the class an escape for the kids, a place where they can go to laugh and play games and win prizes and have fun and learn about Jesus without having to think about the crappiness of life. For an hour out of the week, there are no problems.

My lesson was about how Jesus calmed the storm and how He could help them with tough stuff in life, just like He helped His disciples. Towards the end of the lesson, I said, "Raise your hand if you have ever been scared." My point was going to be that when you're scared, you can put your trust in Jesus and He will help you.

Everyone raised their hands, grinning sheepishly, except for the two children. "I don't get scared," the little girl said.

I smiled at her. "You NEVER get scared? I sure get scared sometimes."

"Well, I don't."

"Not even when you were little?"

"No. Never." She looked at me with defiance shining in her blue eyes, daring me to disagree.

"Wow, you must be really brave."

She nodded her head, completely serious. "I am."

Her younger brother peered at me through his bangs. "I don't get scared either."

I didn't press them any further. "Wow," I said. "These guys NEVER get scared. I've never heard of anyone who hasn''t ever been scared before." And then I went on with the lesson.

Later, we saw the mother outside, standing in the chilly autumn breeze. Terror was stretched across her face. "They're making us leave tomorrow," she said hoarsely. "I have to go back to hell."

We bid farewell to the mother and her children, watching as they stood close to each other, connected by a bond that only hard times could create. As I slid into my grandmother's car, we stared at each other for a moment, sharing a single thought, "Where else do they have to go?"

An abusive father? The streets? A crack house?

The mother is in a terrible situation. That's bad enough. But even worse, there are three little children caught up in the middle of their mother's problems. Who knows what they go through each day? Who knows what they see, what they hear, where they have to sleep at night?

The mother was on drugs. I realize that drugs aren't allowed in Faith City. But what about her kids? Where do her babies have to live after tomorrow? Who is there to look out for them when their world is crashing down around them?

"I'm not afraid." A protective wall was rigid in the little girl's eyes, separating her emotions from the world. She has no one but her two brothers and a mother who can't even walk straight. How can she rebound from problems that leave her drowning when nobody is offering her help?

As Christians in modern day America, how far do we need to go to protect these children? How long are we going to sit here and watch them take blow after blow after blow? How many blows can they bear until they shatter into a thousand pieces?

And why haven't we helped them before now? I can't help but wonder.

I recently got back from Impact camp.  To be honest, I was dreading it more than I would even admit aloud.  I was pretty sure I wouldn't enjoy Impact, but I was attending because I felt like I desperately needed to meet some Christians who were going to A&M.  I dreaded being surrounded by people I didn't know.  I dreaded attempting to sleep in a room filled with other people.  I dreaded being outside in the heat for hours at a time.  I dreaded using up a few of the precious days I had left with my family. 

Even as Mom, Amy, and I pulled into the parking lot and were surprised to see several brightly-dressed counselors cheering and waving us inside, I was feeling panicked and saying, "I don't think I can do this.  Camp just isn't my thing.  I don't think I can do this."

Sometimes if I had my way, I think I would allow my fear to define me.

I plastered a smile on my face, my typical reaction to new places and frightening crowds, and shuffled through the registration line.  I received a yellow lanyard with my name written on a laminated tag that said "Benjians."  I was ushered into a large, loud group of other yellow-wearing teens.  The counselors were dressed in neon hats, tutus, and tall socks.  They had all bleached their hair and many were whooping like Indians.  We were the Benjians, after all. 

Everyone was meeting each other, shaking hands, laughing and joking.  I continued to smile, but inside, I felt like my world was crumbling around me.  This was so far outside my comfort zone that any sense of security or calmness seemed too far behind me to ever find again.  Having a "speed dating" session during the two hour bus ride to the campgrounds and meeting about fifty people during this time did nothing to calm my nerves.  So many faces.  So many names.  So many stories.

I went to Impact camp figuring I would hate it while it lasted, but that it was necessary to make some great Christian friends, so I would try to make the most of my situation.  I had no idea how much I would actually enjoy myself while I was there.

An honest fear of mine was that it would be difficult to find other Christians at a state school.  After attending Impact, I have no doubt that God is moving at A&M and that I can be a part of His work.  I learned that 1 in 7 kids at A&M will have gone to Impact, which is fantastic.  I went to a ministry fair and found some great church and mission prospects.  I made some great Christian friends.  My counselors were so enthusiastic and Christ-like.  By the end of the week, I looked up to them so much.

God really taught me a lesson during those days.

Just because something is outside of my comfort zone doesn't mean that it isn't a good thing.  Yes, throughout the entire four days, I was continually thrust into situations that made me feel anxious and uncomfortable... but that wasn't bad.  Without Impact, I think I would be much more terrified about moving out in a few days than I am right now. 

Impact is doing huge things for A&M.  I've never been so impressed with a camp before.  Impact finds counselors who are willing to be very active in the lives and spiritual walks of their kids, even after camp is over.  Impact has prayer teamers who are constantly in prayer for the freshmen.  Everyone prepares for Impact and prays over the freshmen eight months before the camp even begins. 

Christian friendships are made, a community is created, and much-needed advice is given.  I was shown the importance of attending church while in college and of getting involved in a Christian organization right off the bat.  I was told ways to balance studying and social activities.  I learned the importance of being a light for Christ every step of the way.  We got the opportunity to meet representatives from churches, Bible studies, and Christian sororities and fraternities.  In breakout sessions, we were taught how to glorify God through our lives while at A&M. 

I learned so much and even though I felt uncomfortable at times, I am so glad I went to Impact.  I've never been so glad to have been thrown out of my comfort zone.

The other day, Rebekah, Ali, and I decided to hang out (like always).  We received notice that an elderly hoarder living nearby had recently passed away and her family put all of her belongings into huge dumpsters in her driveway.  Apparently there was so much stuff in this poor woman's home that her family were calling people and begging them to take some of the stuff so they could have more room to fill the dumpsters.

Rebekah, Ali, and I decided that it was worth a peek.  By the time we got there, there was only one giant dumpster filled with interesting objects.  It's amazing how much stuff one person can collect.

We found all sorts of bizarre things, like a gray wig, GIANT underpants, a sparkly statue of a deer, and several bright-colored outfits.  I found some 80s-style moon boots.  One of the funniest things I found was a two-legged bull with a ring in its nose.  It looked so strange that I even took a picture with it.

Rebekah was the only one who actually found some worthwhile things.  She found a colorful belt, which you can see in the picture below.  That was perfect for her since she wears waist-belts all the time.  She also found a sequined purse and a crazyyy sparkly shirt.  It was so fun taking pictures and looking through all of the "treasures." 

Dumpster diving brought back memories from our childhood.  Back in the day when Rebekah and I were neighbors, this wealthy family across the street would celebrate their children's birthdays and Christmas by buying them entire new sets of toys and throwing ALL of their other toys away.  They would also throw away entire seasonal wardrobes and furniture.  Seven-year-old Rebekah and I would peek into the dumpster with great awe at all of the magnificent things that would be inside.  It was like a little toy store, stuffed into big plastic bags.

Why this family didn't donate these perfectly good toys to Goodwill or somewhere, I'll never know.  Occasionally, my mom would pull out the bags of clothes and toys and donate them to homeless shelters.  It seemed like such a waste to let them be thrown away.

Some of our favorite memories are of finding a GIANT stuffed Tigger in the dumpster one day and of finding a set of "diamond" earrings, still in their package.  We thought we'd hit the jackpot.  I remember running home, telling my mom, "How much do you think these are worth?  Thousands and thousands of dollars?!"  Really, the earrings were probably worth only a few dollars.

Our dumpster diving adventures aren't the proudest moments of my childhood, but they made for interesting and funny memories.

Today we made some interesting and funny memories as well.

I hope I never forget these days.