Friday, August 23, 2013

Uncertainty and Satisfaction

Day 22: Where do you see yourself in 5 years? 10 years? 15 years?

I've thought and thought about this.  Even a year ago, I could have sat at this computer and typed out exactly where I saw my life headed, but now I've had to take a step back to reevaluate everything.

I have ideas and I have dreams, but looking at my life sculpted out over the next 15 years, I'm not sure what will happen.  Lately, I've been intentionally taking the time to sit quietly and ask God to reveal His will for my life.  I don't want any part of my future to be of my own purposes.  The Lord was the one who gave me the desires of my heart.  He best knows how to fulfill them.

Now, I do have passions and ideas.  I definitely want to work in missions and world relief projects.  I have a huge heart for orphans and an increasing desire for adoption.  But I also have questions that I'm waiting to be answered.

Also, a year ago I would have described without hesitation my desire for a godly husband, but now that my future is being laid out before me, I've become uncertain if that can happen.  How many men are actually interested in moving to a third world country or international adoption (or both)?  I don't know if my future holds marriage, but I do know that I'm loved unceasingly by the Creator of the world.  I'm in love, and whether or not He places another love in my life, I am satisfied where I am.

I don't know what my future holds.

Will I go or will I stay?  I'm not sure yet.  I'll most likely end up doing both at different points in my life.

In five to fifteen years, I may be serving orphans through a humanitarian organization located in the United States.  I may be living in another country.  I may be in heaven.  I guess we'll have to wait and see.

Two years ago: Awakening Love

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